#maggie as a vampire though

[leagueofdccm]

// also, tmw vampire movies just make me want vampire things for all my muses. like I'm always a sucker for all that. UGH. Vampire. Demons. Hunters. All that dark themes type deals cause it's chef kiss to think of it. Cause also you can do so much when it comes to vampire ideas, and even hunters--- demons also cause they are fun and evil-- like in stories... not in real life. but don't mind me now I'm wrapped around it.

[moopermoment]

art fight fandom how we feeling?

[oveliagirlhaditright]

I'm reading the "The Journals of Rupert Giles," which is a novelization of "Helpless," "New Man," and "Blood Ties" (and all three episodes happen to be about birthdays of Buffy's), and I just... it's giving me negative feelings about Buffy and Riley.

And I'm going to sound like a broken record here, I know, because I'm going to be echoing things the fandom has said numerous times (and for good reason), but here I go, anyway.

(Though I'd still like to note that I definitely don't hate Riley Finn as a character, and I don't hate him and Buffy together. That's a strong word, as I definitely think that Buffy had to go through that sort of a normal relationship in that part of her arc.)

But first of all, at least in this novelization here, Buffy is comparing Riley to Angel in her head (and you can tell, of course, that deep down she wants to be with Angel, even though she can't) even more than we thought she was. And even at the start of her and Riley's relationship, when things were probably their best. And that's just sad and makes me feel for my girl, of course.

Though that's not what really gets me. What really gets me is from the get-go just how much Buffy is worrying that Riley is going to be offended that she's stronger than him, or whatever. And that she's making herself lesser to try and please him (like when she holds back when they're sparring. Though, to be fair, she may have had to, since he's a human and she's the Slayer). But she's just constantly worrying about how things are going to go over with him, and how he's going to feel about who she is. And, I mean, we saw this in the show. But there's even more of it when we're in her headspace.

And it's just a complete contrast to when Buffy and Angel spar in "Helpless," where he's "completely down with her being her bad self" (something like that is pretty much an exact quote from the book). And Buffy is so relieved that she can completely let loose with him, unlike most anyone else. (And, again, I know Buffy probably couldn't do this with Riley for his own safety, so it's probably unfair to judge that.) But "Angel is as graceful in defeat as he is in victory" (another quote from the book), and is glad when she wins their sparring matches, because: you know: It means that a vamp or any other beast from Hell probably won't get the drop on her? Meanwhile, when Buffy wins against Riley, he's telling Buffy to give him a few weeks and he can probably take her. Gah!

[venussaidso]

Very interesting the connections that Ketu and Jupiter has with Frankenstein's monsters.

In the upcoming film "Bride" Jessie Buckley will play the Bride of Frankenstein and Christian Bale will play Frankenstein's monster.

Both are Ketuvian. She's Mula Sun, and he is Ashwini Moon. The film is made by Maggie Gyllenhaal who is a Vishakha Sun.

Benedict Cumberbatch and Jonny Lee Miller in (National Theatre Live 2011) "Frankenstein" interchangeably play the Creature (Frankenstein's monster) and Victor Frankenstein. Benedict Cumberbatch is an Ashwini Moon and Jonny Lee Miller is a Vishakha Sun.

The play was literally directed by Ashwini Moon Danny Boyle.

In the film "Lisa Frankenstein", Magha Ascendant Cole Sprouse plays a corpse from the Victorian-era who was resurrected to life (named Creature, commonly being Frankenstein's monster), and his love interest is played by Shatabhisha Moon Kathryn Newton as Lisa Frankenstein. The film is directed by Punarvasu Moon Zelda Williams.

Cole Sprouse's character reminds me of Emily the Corpse Bride from the film "Corpse Bride", voiced by Magha Moon Helena Bonham Carter and the movie being made by Magha Sun Tim Burton.

What I found so interesting was how the internet is intuitively sensitive to Ketu energies as they have connected Laura Harrier to this character in online fan-casting. Laura Harrier is literally an Ashwini Moon.

In the film "Van Helsing" Frankenstein's monster is now played by a Jupiterian instead of a Ketuvian. Purva Bhadrapada Sun Shuler Hensley.

Purva Bhadrapada Moon Daniel Radcliffe, though he plays Igor, Frankenstein's sickly hunchback assistant, in the film "Victor Frankenstein". And in this film it is Ashwini Sun James McAvoy who played Victor Frankenstein.

And Tim Burton's "Frankenweenie" animation movie, it is Mula Moon Charlie Tahan who voices young Victor Frankenstein who resurrects his dog.

Purva Bhadrapada Moon Jacob Elordi will be playing Frankenstein in Guillermo Del Toro's retelling of the story, ultimately replacing Purva Bhadrapada Ascendant Andrew Garfield who was up for the role. AND Purva Bhadrapada Sun Oscar Isaac will be playing Victor Frankenstein.

Link to article

A couple of years ago, I remember Scarlett Johansson was in talks for a "Bride of Frankenstein" movie, and this was never heard of again. I doubt the project has been finalized or proceeded, considering the fact that it's been four years now. But still noteworthy as she is Vishakha Moon so perfectly fits this post.

Vishakha Sun Emma Stone stars in the film "Poor Things", based on a book with the same name which is a clever feminist retelling of Mary Shelley's known work.

A film quite aligned with "Poor Things" is actually "Frankenhooker", being that the 'Creature' is a victimized female, starring Punarvasu Sun Patty Mullen who plays a girlfriend accidentally killed by her scientist boyfriend and is resurrected by him with the use of her head and separate body parts of deceased prostitutes.

This film was literally directed by Magha Sun and Purva Bhadrapada Moon Frank Henenlotter.

Mary Shelley, the creator of the tale of Frankenstein, was a Mula Moon and Ardra Ascendant, a gothic novelist whose work is considered one of the earliest work of science fiction 🖤

Literally went into more examples about Ketu's connections to transcendence, life, death, resurrection etc. in part 2 of my Ketu exploration. And also my vampire post.

[abiteofhoney]

Xena’s Writeblr Intro

hello, i figured it’s time to do an official intro. i’ve been here for a while but now i have some wips to talk about :) i’m Xena - it/its. i am a writer and a fang enthusiast! a little about me and my account first:

• i write what i guess could mostly be categorized as fantasy and romance, but im happy to read any genre and give anything a chance. • i am open to being tagged in tag games, but i can’t promise that i’ll do them. • i do not have taglists for my work and i wont offer them, its just a personal preference of mine. • i will join taglists though (please check with me before adding me to any taglists) • my asks and inbox are always open :)

and the fun part, my wips!!

#The Vampire and The Devilspawn 🩸

read it here!! my most recent story, starring a vampire and a devilspawn as the title advertises! In a world with many creatures, vampires and devilspawn work closely together. Devilspawn are responsible for guiding fledglings into being successful vampires. Magdalena Pierce is a new vampire fledgling with no memories of her life before, but a vicious hatred in her heart for the devilspawn around her. Leader of the devilspawn, Anzurin, is determined to tame her and figure out the secrets of her past. (some art of them down below, done by yours truly)

#The Noble Prince ⚔️

Kieran Noble starts a new job in a new city, determined to leave his past behind. But when he’s tasked with guarding a strange prisoner, she enraptures him, and he sets out to learn everything he can about her. Things he never wanted to know begin to come to light. Things he left behind catch back up to him and he gets dumped into a world he could have never dreamed of.

I have a few other wips, some i don’t talk about on here, and some I do but haven’t touched recently enough to make them relevant. those two are my main ones at the moment :)

here’s the art of Maggie and Anzurin as promised :)

[thegamingcatmom]

How do you think the denalis would react to a reader who loves giving head?

Same question for the Resident evil ladies

I mean-

Pretty much that, LMAO.

Ofc they´re all for it. What´s not to love about a beautiful lady expressing that love and devotion by devouring you like she´s got them cravings? 😩🤌

So, I´d say the inward reaction is more or less the same, no matter which lady we´re talking.

On the outside, however-

Listen, some of us got a reputation to uphold, aight?

...With that said:

(Imma switch to "you" here cause it flows a lot better and makes for a more immersive feeling. ;3)

Warning Promise: Things are about to get rather gay.

.

.

.

Tanya Denali:

doesn´t care about the place

outside, inside, up, down, above, under - great, she´ll take it

she does care about the position though

we´ve been through this - she´s no Bottom

so, don´t expect her to lie down like a pillow princess

she´s a leader, ffs

an alpha

she´s either gonna be sitting (preferably on your face) or standing

perhaps she´ll lift a leg for easier access if she´s standing

then it´s showtime

she enjoys herself thoroughly and has no problem letting the world know

why shouldn´t they know?

you belong to her just as she belongs to you, after all

let them hear

when she´s feeling particularly naughty, she´ll make sure to sound as much like a porn star as she can manage

to say she loves it when you turn as red as a lobster would be quite the understatement

it drives her wild

which is one of the reasons she does it in the first place

the other reason is to ensure her sisters won´t come within miles of the two of you

(and they better stay there)

...it´s also a massive boost to her ego though, it has to be said

seeing the effect she has on you, even when she´s the one receiving?

more often than not, that´s the final straw for her

Kate Denali:

like Tanya, she doesn´t really care about the place

but, unlike Tanya, she also doesn´t care about the position

she´s just damn happy to be here, yknow?

will curse

a lot

will also compliment you

a lot

it´s actually a combination, like-

"Fuck! You´re so pretty down on your knees. All f-for me? Fucking...p-perfect! My perfect little princezná. God-"

she loves letting you know what a mess she is

all because of you

her perfect little warrior

she´ll always worship you, even when she´s the one receiving

and not just vocally

she´ll touch anywhere she can reach

will comb her fingers through your hair

will cradle and stroke your cheek/s

stroke your back

massage your shoulders

just anywhere, yknow?

she needs that contact

(she might be a battle-hardened warrior, but she´ll turn into a huge sap softie for the right person)

she´s surprisingly sentimental too, afterwards

one might even call it poetic

"If my heart could still remember how to beat, it would race in your presence...my perfect little warrior."

Irina Denali

(I know that´s not from Twilight, but listen: I need me some gifs where Irina aka Maggie looks happy, pls and ty. 😭)

she´s big Mama

(yes, I´ll keep saying it because it´s important)

she finds your enthusiasm absolutely endearing

will giggle

hand covering her mouth and all

scrunching her nose

(she´s so precious)

unlike her sisters, she prefers a more private location

preferably in your shared bedroom

she might be convinced to do it just about anywhere in the house though, as long as it can be assured it´s free of prying eyes and ears

outside might work, but only if the area is rather secluded

(she´s a private person, aight? even more so when it comes to anything bedroom-related, like, excuse? it´s hard enough sharing you with her sisters, so she´s not gonna go and give some strangers a show that´s meant for her eyes alone-)

(...fine, and her sisters´)

(ugh)

vampires don´t get cramps or anything, but she still prefers lying down for it

it just makes the experience more intense for her because, despite being quite literally indestructible, she craves that vulnerability

it´s all about having someone you can bare your soul to, someone who gets you on a deep emotional level

she needs that connection to be able to fully let herself go

but when she does, oh boy-

she´ll make the sweetest sounds

whimpering, moaning, mewling - all of it rather high-pitched and shifting in volume, depending on how close she is

won´t stop running her fingers through your hair

will whisper sweet nothings

"My good girl...making me feel so good...I love you...so much."

will keep calling you her "good girl" all the way through because she loves seeing the effect it has on you

which affects her in return

which affects you in return

which affects-

.

.

.

Without further ado, onto the Village Ladies!

(Not sure if you were referring solely to the Dimi sisters? Anyhow, my thirsty ass added two more, hope you don´t mind. 🙃✌️)

Bela Dimitrescu

she´s a Momma´s girl

which means she's a mix between condescending and encouraging

(more condescending though)

will keep calling you her "little one"

she talks a lot actually

someone has to make sure you´re reminded of your place, after all

and of hers

(all that talking is more or less for her own ego tbh)

(she´s got a reputation to uphold, aight?)

(she´s more bark than bite, most of the time)

(except when she isn´t)

(that shit hurts like a bitch btw)

"Look at you, little one...d-down on your knees for me...as it s-should be..."

"You should count yourself l-lucky, little one...to be in a position d-desired by...many-" *proceeds to break into incoherent mumbling*

"S-Serve me well, little one, and I will...I will ask Mother to...k-keep you..."

(jokes on you, that was never a question)

you would never dare say it out loud (you rather enjoy living, tyvm), but the fact she´s such a tryhard will never not amuse you

it´s very obvious she´s trying to mimic her mother

trying to be all intimidating and shit

emphasis on trying

because she fails spectacularly at it

every time

she reminds you of a spitting kitten actually

(those claws hurt like a mf though)

Cassandra Dimitrescu

(I fucking love that shot. Look at that lazy ass bish. You just know she cba about pretty much anything.)

she´s a bit like Kate actually

minus the whole worshipping

which means she´ll pretty much curse the whole way through

also loves to dirty talk

"Fuck! Someone´s been practising, hm? F-Fucking the maids in secret, are you? Dirty little whore, of course you are...f-fuck! MORE!"

she´s loud

very

and proud

very

she loves letting the whole castle know just what the two of you are up to

especially because it annoys the heck outta her sisters

(especially Bela)

also has her sickle with her

always

(it´s her partner in crime, what did ya expect?)

she´ll use it as a way to ground herself

literally

sometimes, it misses you by a hair´s breadth when she goes about impaling the ground right next to you or the wall she´s leaning against

dw, she knows what she´s doing

...probably

listen-

there´s no way she´s gonna let such a dedicated little thing like you slip through her fingers

much less on accident

what a waste that would be

so I´d say you´re pretty safe

(for now)

Daniela Dimitrescu

she´s vibrating

literally

getting her to remain somewhat still is a struggle, lemme tell ya

she´s like a hyperactive puppy

and she chitters like a little birdie

sometimes, she´ll hiss like a spitting kitten too

with Dani, you got a whole farm in your bedroom, it has to be said

she´ll keep telling you how much she loves you

then she´ll switch to almost beheading you

accidently, ofc

she´s just so...excited, yknow?

and she has a rather tight grip on your hair indeed

oh wait, she´s back to telling you how much she loves you

...

it also becomes painfully clear to her that you haven´t said it back yet

"D-Don´t you love me?!"

...

"Mine, you´re mineminemineminemine-"

that´s her fav word btw

she´ll chant it like a mantra almost all the way through

sometimes, she´ll scream it too

"SAY THAT YOU´RE MINE!"

...

she´s back to telling you how she´s always dreamed of finding true love

all loving and tenderly

a stark contrast to the maniac who almost beheaded you only seconds ago

accidently, ofc

she loves you

"Y-You´re mine...my...my Princess Charming...aren´t you? J-Just like...in the books...yes? We shall have a...A SPRING WEDDING!"

...

ofc my love, whatever you say my love

(I luv u pls no kill)

Lady Alcina Dimitrescu

she´s Big Mama

literally

but also Scary Mama

literally

she´ll have them claws out just because

(mostly to intimidate you, let´s be real)

it makes her feel like the apex predator that she is as she reclines in that big chair of hers

it´s massive, really

(we still talking about the chair?)

one leg propped up as she´s being served like a true queen

as it should be

she´ll watch you with a mix of endearment and loftiness (much like in the gif)

dancing the tips of her claws along your back

or stroking them up and down

or running them through your hair when she´s having an extra soft moment

(those are rare)

her other hand is occupied holding a glass of wine

(duh)

swirling it occasionally

taking a sip here and there

in the meantime, she´ll be fantasizing about all the ways she could end your life

(shit turns dark rather quickly in this household)

a swipe of her hand would suffice...

it´s about power, aight?

thinking about the power she holds drives her wild

she also loves taunting you

"Sssuch a nimble little mouse..."

"Or perhaps...masochistic would be a more fitting term, hm? So eager to ssserve...a dragon..."

you won´t catch her moaning and whimpering like a mutt in heat

instead, she´ll draw out some of the syllables

or hiss

sometimes, she´ll pause in between words (probs the most apparent sign that what you´re doing is affecting her a lot more than she lets on)

when she´s getting closer, the occasional grunt might escape too

more like a growl, really

however, despite her aloof demeanor, she can´t deny that she finds your devotion most...charming

that´s probs why she keeps you around in the first place

cause we all know Big Mama likes getting her ego stroked

among other things

Mother Miranda

oh boy bird

she´s Birb Mama

feathers and all

she´s also crazy Mama

crazy eyes

crazy smile

yes, she does smile

occasionally

it´s more a smirk, tbh

she does so enjoy it when her devoted little followers show her just how devoted they are

she´ll wear them robes ofc

parted just enough to allow access

feathers poking out here and there

gotta be careful not to swallow one or smt

that´d be hella uncomfortable for sure

anyhow-

you´re in the church

(duh)

but the things going on there are far from holy

she´ll stand before you

more like you´ll kneel before her

as you should be

no hands

you ain´t touching none of that

divinity shall not be sullied by the likes of you

(...we´re not gonna talk about the fact you´re sullying her alright in this very moment)

just like Big Mama, she´ll taunt you

"Is this what you wish for in your prayers at night, hm?"

running her claws (aka her rings) through your hair

"Tell me, child...does this village harbor more corrupted souls such as yourself?"

grip getting tighter

and tighter

claws starting to dig in-

*hiss*

the sound of pain evokes a small chuckle

her grip loosens a smidge in response though

(see? she´s a huge softie :3)

"Perhaps I shall cleanse it, hm? Liberate it from its sinners... What do you think, little bird?"

it´s a rhetorical question ofc

(thank fuck)

Miranda does as Miranda damn well pleases

(the idea of Miranda threatening to erase a whole village while she´s being served is so real though)

she´s very composed, all things considered

("all things" being: you eating her out as if your life depends on it)

(I mean...)

it´s almost like she´s talking about the weather or smt, honestly

then she removes her rings

the only indication you´re nearing the grand finale

now she can actually hold on tight without having to worry about impaling your pretty head

very much so

shit hurts so good like hell

but it´s also a precaution

the thing is...Miranda might not be vocal about her feelings

but she doesn´t have to be

her transforming is all the confirmation you need

it´s her way of letting go, you could say

she won´t go all out though

just parts of herself

her fingers being one of them

(yall are familiar with her mutated form, right? them fingers be going on for days)

hence, the precaution

she has lost quite a few rings that way

she´s grown rather fond of the current set

it´s got black tips and all

🖤💅🏻

.

.

.

Yall noticed how it got more unhinged as we progressed? The slow descent into madness was real with this one, LMAO. 💀

I could feel the obsession starting to creep back in with every word, lel. Dani might have just become my fav among the daughters. :3

Thanks a lot for your ask! I had a lot of fun with this one. 💋

[harlowsbby]

Fun & Games 💘

Requested, leaving a hickey on Jack’s neck even though he has an important event to attend.

“Alright, alright baby I love you but I’m almost certain I won’t have any skin left if you keep sucking on my neck.” Jack joked as you pulled away to admire your work.

“Hmm you weren’t saying that a few minutes ago.. last time I remember you were groaning and moaning all in my ear.” You smirked as his cheeks turned a slight shade of pink.

“Whatever, let’s not act like you weren’t doing the same.” He laughed.

“How bad is it though? You know the guys will clown me all day if I pull up with a hickey.”

Jack had to meet up with the guys in a few hours to go over a few last minute things for tour and the last thing he wanted to happen was for them to laugh and joke about him having a hickey on his neck.

Even though they were all grown he just knew they couldn’t resist the urge to make fun of him.

Based off the shock expression that was displayed on your face and the way you covered your mouth to hide your laughter, Jack already knew it was bad.

“Babe.” He whined softly and tossed his head back in frustration. “I told you to be careful now I’m going to have to deal with this all day.” He huffed.

You rolled your eyes and removed yourself from his embrace. “Where are you going?” He stated as you walked out the bedroom door.

“I’m going to go freeze a spoon and then put it on your neck.” He was even more confused both his eyebrows scrunched together.

“A frozen spoon? What is that gonna do?”

“I’m not sure but I seen on tik tok if you freeze a spoon and place it on your hickey it’s supposedly suppose to help.” You shrugged your shoulders and went to freeze the spoon.

After a few minutes of letting the spoon sit in the freezer you took it out and placed it on Jack’s neck to which he jumped back due to the coldness.

“Stop acting like a baby and let me see.”

You placed the spoon back on but there was no luck the hickey was still very much there.

“What am I going to do now? I can’t go meet up with them like this.” He groaned once more.

“Are you ashamed or something?” You pouted and his eyes widened. “I’m not baby I just it isn’t really prefessiona-.” He stopped talking when your lips started to quiver.

You tended to act like you were upset with Jack at times even if you weren’t just so you could get your way.

“It’s fine it’ll be fine hopefully they won’t notice. I’ll see you later okay?” He placed a kiss on your lips before leaving.

You smirked. “Works every time.” You laughed and went to catch up on some shows while Jack tried to prepare himself for what was to come.

Little time skip.

“Jack, what’s that on your neck man?” Ace asked the minute Jack walked into the studio.

“It’s nothing why are you even looking at my neck.” Jack asked and pulled the two strings of his hoodie to try and cover his neck.

“Why are you acting so strange?” 2fo asked him with a raised eyebrow.

“I’m not acting strange you’re all acting strange.” He quickly stated and turned his head a bit to see all the guys looking directly at him.

“How are we acting strange? You’re the one wearing a hoodie indoors and earlier when I called you, you weren’t trying to show your face.”

“Right, what’s going on with you?” Urban added on.

Clay watched as Jack fidgeted in his seat there was only one other time Jack acted this way and that’s when he was trying to hide a hickey from Maggie back in High School.

A knowing smirk pulled at the corners of Clay’s mouth.

“You have a hickey don’t you?” Everyone in the room stopped questioning Jack as Clay spoke.

“Dude, did Y/N leave a hickey on your neck?”

Ace laughed and sure enough Jack removed the hood from his head and turned to the guys and sure enough right below his earlobe was a big fat hickey.

“Damn!!” All the guys yelled out. “Y/N must be half vampire or some shit.” Ace laughed along with everyone else.

“Honestly because damn that shit is huge.” Urban laughed and went to take a picture of Jack’s neck.

“Not too much on my girl alright ima wear her hickey proudly.” He stated which resulted in everyone laughing at him again.

“Yeah come on let’s not act like you all didn’t have any at one point.” Nemo stepped in to break it up and to defend Jack.

“You do you Jack but we’re not letting this go.” Ace said and sadly he meant that.

The entire day was filled with the guys clowning and teasing Jack, but he didn’t dare or paid them any mind.

He was in a healthy and beautiful relationship and that’s all that mattered.

(I hope you enjoy anon! and everyone else 💘)

[coraniaid]

for the ask meme: principal snyder

[Reverse unpopular opinion meme.]

Not sure how unpopular a take this is but I really like Principal Snyder.  He is genuinely one of my favorite minor characters on the show.

There are, I guess, a few different reasons for that.

The first is just a question of good timing. Snyder arrives during the second half of the first season, which is – to my mind, anyway – the point where the show really starts to find its feet.  (This is also, I suspect, part of the reason I’m so fond of Jenny Calendar, who shows up at around the same time.)  And he’s a recurring figure throughout the show’s second and third seasons too, which – while they might not be objectively the show’s best years – are certainly the seasons I personally have the most nostalgic feeling for and whose failings I’m most willing to overlook.  Snyder’s part of my favorite two and half seasons of the show, so I’m predisposed to enjoy him as a character.

Second, and along similar lines, Snyder is a type of character that I think that the latter seasons don’t really have: a recurring character who is somewhat important to Buffy’s regular life but entirely ignorant of the supernatural side of that life. Yes, we find out early in Season 2 that Snyder knows more about vampires than he lets on, and that he’s reporting directly to the Mayor; but that connection doesn’t seem to add up to him being in on the Mayor’s big Ascenion plan and he doesn’t show any sign of knowing that Buffy herself is the Slayer.

After the high school seasons, who else is there like this?  Parker Abrams, I guess, very early in Season 4, but … that’s it, right?  There are characters who could have taken up Snyder's mantle – Dawn’s social worker, for example, or Buffy’s second manager at the Doublemeat Palace, both in Season 6 – but for whatever reason nobody does. Almost everyone else Buffy meets after high school either turns out to be deeply connected to the supernatural -- other than Parker everyone she spends any time with in college turns out to be a demon, a witch or a member of the Initiative; the next Principal of Sunnydale High is the son of a previous Slayer, the doctor she starts talking to when her Mom gets sick is the mortal vessel of a hell god -- or just not a regular part of the show at all. I can’t even remember the name of any of Buffy’s college professors other than Maggie Walsh. 

And I think that’s a shame, because the existence of Principal Snyder as a low-level recurring antagonist makes Buffy’s life as a regular teenage girl feel a lot more consequential than it otherwise might.  If Buffy only had problems with one-off teachers we’d never seen or heard of before, or if she frequently complained about getting into trouble with an off-screen principal we never got to see on screen, the world of the show would just feel a little less grounded. And, in particular, Snyder's function as the show's clear unsympathetic authority figure implicitly helps make both Buffy's Mom and her Watcher much more sympathetic than they might otherwise be

More important than either of those points though, I think Snyder is just really fun to watch?  For my money, the writers strike almost the ideal balance between making him an unpleasant self-important bully and making him a ridiculous comic figure (one who, crucially, at no point shows any sign of being in on the joke).  Armin Shimerman is unfailingly great in the role from his very first appearance, and he gets such wonderfully silly lines to say. 

Some of my favorites:

“There are some things I can just smell.  It’s like a sixth sense.”   

“What are you, ghouls?  There are no dead students here … this week.” 

“That’s the kind of wooly-headed liberal thinking that leads to being eaten.” 

"Children everywhere ... Like locusts, crawling around, mindlessly bent on feeding and mating, destroying everything in sight in their relentless, pointless desire to exist."

“Why couldn’t you be dealing drugs like normal people?” 

"This is a time of celebration. So sit still and be quiet."

“There are things I will not tolerate: students loitering on campus after school, horrible murders with hearts being removed. And also smoking.”

Finally, I really like the fact that – unlike, say, Shimerman’s other big 90s genre TV role, Quark on Deep Space 9, and unlike somebody like Jonathan who was also a recurring character in the high school years who didn’t (then) know that Buffy was the Slayer – Snyder really never gets any more depth or attempts to make him sympathetic.  He never gets fully brought into the magical world or gets given some sort of character arc or has any previously well-hidden virtues suddenly revealed.

Yes, okay, there’s the aforementioned ties to the Mayor and the brief glimpse we get of teenage Snyder in Band Candy. But for all practical purposes the Principal Snyder we see in Season 1’s The Puppet Show – delighting in causing Buffy and her friends problems for no reason while boasting about how, unlike his predecessor, he’s too tough and disciplined to ever get eaten – is the same Principal Snyder we see in Season 3’s Graduation Day, getting eaten.

[curioushabitforarivergod]

dark(ish) academia books that I don't see recommended enough

I read a lot, both fiction and non-fiction, and a lot of the stuff I've read over the past 2-3 years has had underlying academic tones. I've tried to include books I've at least enjoyed, although there are a few 3 star ratings. All of these books are ones I haven't really seen mentioned in compiled dark academia lists (mainly because some of them fall outside the general scope and are more ✨vibes✨). Feel free to add more less well-known books. I've included my own blurbs of the books but I've got shit memory and some I read like 2 years ago so yeah

Fiction

"Let us read, and let us dance; these two amusements will never do any harm to the world." Voltaire

To the Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf

Takes place over 10 years and explores family and the destruction left behind after WWI. It discusses the feminine vs. masculine in art and while it can be a little slow to read (took me close to 3 weeks!) theres some really beautiful passages and also some funny ones as well — the characters spend several chapters at a dinner party convinced everyone hates them and constantly hating other people too.

The Dark is Rising (series) by Susan Cooper

Okay, yes this is a kids book series from the 70s/80s but it explores English, Cornish and Welsh mythology and has really good characters and world-building. Even though chronologically the series goes: Over Sea, Under Stone; The Dark is Rising; Greenwitch; The Grey King; Silver on the Tree, it's best to read The Dark is Rising first and return back to Over Sea, Under Stone. Anyway, I love this series and I read The Dark is Rising every Christmas because it corresponds pretty much with the days and is easy to place and that's kind of what makes it feel very cozy and academic. Also, theres some brief moments of time travel to the past.

The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova

This is a beautiful written masterpiece set across the 20th century featuring plenty of train rides across Europe and vampires. It explores some of the history of Walachia and Dracula, as well as the Ottoman Empire and European politics of the time. It's a hefty read but I loved it because it combines history, dark academia, fantasy and vampires.

Macbeth by William Shakespeare

My favourite of Shakespeare that I've seen so far and honestly murder is so dark academia I don't need to talk any further. Strangely, I don't see this recommended enough.

Hamnet by Maggie O'Farrell

This was quite popular a year or two ago, and honestly for good reason. I think it's only really academic because it's linked to Shakespeare and explores the less well-known lives of Shakespeare's family, but it's very good and I thought I'd include it anyway.

Piranesi by Susanna Clarke

This one feels really light academia to me, but I think it's mainly because of setting. It's set in this fantastical old and crumbling mansion that goes on forever. It's filled with statues and it floods and only two people live in the world. The story is told entirely through diary entries, but it's so well-written because it defamiliarises the reader entirely. It was a light and easy read for me, which is probably why I'm associating it with light academia rather than dark academia.

The Book of Goose by Yiyun Li

This book kinda mixes chaotic academia and cottagecore academia and is a reflection of girlhood and youth spent in the French countryside in the 50s. There's a toxic relationship between two friends who write a book together before one of them attends prestigious girls' school in England. Also the opening lines are amazing: "You cannot cut an apple with an apple. You cannot cut an orange with an orange. You can, if you have a knife, cut an apple or an orange. Or slice open the underbelly of a fish. Or, if your hands are steady enough and the blade is sharp enough, sever an umbilical cord."

Brideshead Revisited by Evelyn Waugh

Another classic! I love Waugh, and Brideshead revisited is amazing and my favourite of what I've read of his. The book is quite homoerotic — explicitly so at times, which is fascinating for something published in 1945 — and deals with romanticisation. It nestles quite snugly between Picture of Dorian Grey and Secret History in terms of a dark academic literary canon.

Northanger Abbey by Jane Austen

This is more gothic than dark academia, but it's also a satire of the gothic genre so I feel like it counts. It's definetly not as well known as some of Austen's other works and feels much more raw, particularly because its her first work (although not published until after her death). It's not my favourite Austen, but I love it all the same, especially because of its commentary on warning the romanticisation of other peoples lives and the gothic/dark academia. Although dark academia wasn't a thing in Austen's day!

Possession by A. S. Byatt

I love the main story but because its so metafictive and explores the relationship between two made-up poets (one of whom is bi and cheats on her gf with the second) from the perspective of modern academics, it can get quite hard to read sometimes. It's also really long, but definitely worth reading.

Non-Fiction

I feel like non-fiction is pretty over-looked when it comes to the academia aesthetic which really says something, given that its… kinda the whole point of academia?? Anyway, I read a lot of history books, but I only put down the ones which I found interesting or easy to read, so they're more popular histories than academic histories. Also; essays.

The Year 1000: What Life Was Like At the Turn of the First Millennium by Robert Lacey

This explores early medieval life in England based on the Julius Work Calendar, an Anglo-Saxon manuscript believed to date to 1020BCE. It's honestly a really light and interesting read and it talks about what everyday life was like, which I think is important in history. It's in a narrative style so it's quite easy to read even if you don't consume history often.

Oh, to Be a Painter! by Virginia Woolf

This is actually a short, published collection of Virginia Woolf essays on art. I read the essays all in one sitting because they're quite short, but if you're into art and art academia, I'd highly recommend. There's also an essay on the cinema which provides some interesting insights into todays world particularly as Woolf was writing at the time when cinema was only just becoming widespread and an industry in its own right.

A Modest Proposal by Jonathan Swift

This is a satirical essay on attitudes towards the poor and it suggests that poor people might sell their children as food for the rich, highlighting the callousness of the upper classes. It's available free online and very much relevant today, despite being written close to 300 years ago.

The Time Traveller's Guide to Elizabethan England by Ian Mortimer

Very useful if you ever find yourself stuck in the Elizabethan period! It's read as a sort of travel guide but includes plenty on history as well, providing a picture of what England looked like in the late-Tudor period. Also people will think you're a time-traveller if you carry it around, which adds to your intrigue and mystery.

A Memoir of Jane Austen by James Edward Austen-Leigh

If you like Jane Austen and haven't read this memoir, you should. It's written by her nephew, so it's quite biased and it's not amazing in any way, but it provides a lot of context to her life and is a good light-read or coffee table book. Also my copy was pale pink so win.

Thats it folks. Feel free to include your own less well-known book recs that follow dark/light/chaotic, etc. aesthetics! I'd love to compile a huge list and read more outside my comfort zone.

[sunnywalnut]

I had a dream last night. A Good Omens dream. So naturally, I have to share it with the Masses. Because I'm a pathetic wet cat who deserves attention.

Our friends Crowley and Aziraphale were there of course, and as was I. For some reason. I was like their child (or rather, I was in the place of Adam, where they protected and cared for me, but I was still an adult. As I am now). Not the oddest thing that's happened in my dreams so I'll let it slide. So here I am hanging out with my Ineffable Dads after calling off Armageddon and what do they do to celebrate? Drink, of course.

So we're sitting in the bookshop, Crowley on the couch, Aziraphale in his chair, and I am perched up on the desk. Drinking some floral wine that tastes a lot like chamomile tea(I don't drink. But I do like chamomile tea). And Crowley gets stupid drunk.

Two bottles later, he jolts up from the couch like a vampire from his coffin, turns to look at Aziraphale (who isn't phased by this behavior), and immediately is glued to his side.

I'm talking sprawled out across his back, head hanging over his shoulder, slurring drunkenly and his arms wrapped around his waist. And he's just cooing at him.

"You know I love you, 'ngel?"

He reaches out a long, thin finger, tracing one of Aziraphale's curls, making the angel chuckle. "You're so pretty, Angel."

He kisses his cheek and neck and the side of his face, earning full belly laughter from the angel who is reaching up to pull him closer.

"Crowleyyyy!"

"Shhh, Angel, lemme kiss you-"

Drunker than a dog, Crowley grabs for his angel and continues to press hasty kisses across his face, Aziraphale giggling all the while. I just shake my head and turn to my tea(because apparently it was tea, just in a wine glass to make me feel included. Aziraphale's idea, I'm sure. The tea. I think the wine glass was Crowley. Seems like a Crowley thing to do).

Allowing the two lovebirds to do what they do, fully amused and proud of them for finally being able to openly express affection, I look up to find Aziraphale heading out the door- wearing Crowley on his back like a booze-drenched exoskeleton. They're both giggling like a bunch of school children, Aziraphale shushing Crowley but only ending up giggling even louder himself. They're trying to sneak past me. I let them.

I follow about ten steps after these Ineffable Bastards, the streetgoers of Soho giving them and me questionable looks but I just wave them off. Because I suppose this was when everyone was revived. Because of course it was. We stagger down to The Dirty Donkey and Aziraphale drops his demon in a barstool, fixes the lapels of his jacket, and proudly announces that he would like an "Angel Shot" the bartender, Maggie, looks concerned.

She immediately puts away the glass she was polishing, leaning in close.

"Are you alright, Honey?"

Aziraphale stares, eyes glazed over with both booze and confusion.

"Pardon?"

"Do you need me to call someone?"

Crowley reaches over to grab Aziraphale's thigh, leaning in to whisper something in his ear. He forgets, though, and kisses underneath his ear to make up for it. Aziraphale starts giggling again.

It's clear to everyone now, including Maggie, that he was in no real danger. It was a simple mistake. And they had pregamed. She's giggling as well, but trying to hide it.

"Alright, what can I get you two?"

They decide on some sort of almost clear drink in a shot glass, three for each. I have a mocktail. More drunken giggling and flirting. Crowley has found his way pressed up against Aziraphale's side yet again. Everyone is delighted and amused by this behavior, seeing as not one person has seen him this relaxed since.... Well, since forever. They let it be.

The night ends with me walking them both home while they stumble against one another, laughing about something or another that I couldn't even begin to decipher. And we wander on home. To the bookshop.

Aziraphale wanders in, miracling(miracleing?) the door open after the key proves to be stubborn with the lock. Crowley follows. Is this normal? I don't know. Aziraphale doesn't seem to be worried, though, so I allow it. Not much I can do about it, honestly. It's not like Crowley would let me.

I follow them in, pushing stacks of books back in place as Crowley's wandering arms threaten to knock them down, the statues nearly ready to fall. I give him a warning glare. He does not respond.

Both angel and demon wander up the stairs and into a bedroom with rich yellow walls and the curtains drawn. The bed is untouched, pale yellow pillows peeking out from underneath off-white sheets. Crowley makes a start for it. Aziraphale hovers at the doorway, then follows. They both crawl into their respective sides, as if by impulse. Crowley on the left, Aziraphale on the right. Only Aziraphale has the mind to miracle himself into nightclothes. Crowley is already asleep.

Seeing as they both are no longer in danger of harming themselves, I turn out the light and close the door. Off to my own place, I would believe. Except I wouldn't know. I woke up.

Still not entirely sure why my dreams are fanfics now but you know what, I'm not complaining. It was cute as hell.

[danburys]

i do feel that a leverage wwdits au would rule.

of course they'd just be four vampires and also nate who initially tries to get them for tax fraud but ends up encouraging them to commit more altruistic tax fraud instead.

sophie turns nate into a vampire and has no regrets about it.

they're all kind of obsessed with nate's still-human ex-wife maggie. anyone who's even slightly rude to her ends up brutally murdered, what a coincidence.

eliot is Angsty about not being able to eat human food any longer. parker and hardison are fixing this by doing increasingly horrifying experiments with blood to modify its taste. it's turning eliot into a furious blood snob.

hardison is an incredibly young vampire who has to explain everything modern. he has a protégé, breanna, who's made a secret pact with parker to be turned in a few years bc hardison refuses to do it.

sophie is ancient and dignified and trying to make it on the stage, if only she weren't the worst actress in the world who drinks from her worst critics and often overdoes it with hypnotizing others to the point of scrambling their brains.

parker is the creepiest out of all of them and takes great joy in all the most athletic vampire skills. she's the worst at bat transformation, always turns into some weird monstrosity instead. it's okay, though, she makes it work.

[missygoesmeow]

missy's tips for honour mode :) (it's very long I'm sorry) (oh and here be many spoilers) (but pictures too!)

please note I am not a pro gamer or anything. I sucked so bad when I first started this game (I had no idea wtf I was doing). Like seriously. I didn't know what an action was. what a bonus action was. "No movement left". WHAT DO YOU MEAN NO MOVEMENT LEFT. I had played DnD once before.

I literally bought this game because of Astarion.

I usually play one game and that is Overwatch. the only other time I stopped playing OW was to play Resident Evil: Village because of Lady D. vampire marketing works on me. specifically evil vampire. damn u Neil and Maggie.

if you have any questions about a specific boss or something feel free to ask! I didn't fight everyone though - like I did not do House of Grief because I didn't need to and also it's hard :)

I think a lot of it just came on down to...

ANYWAY. letsa go! this is very rambling!

Like I said in my reply to anon, the best tip is to do tactician FIRST. You’ll get destroyed otherwise. I didn’t finish my tactician run but I did get to act 3 and I did most boss fights (Gortash, Raphael, Cazador). Bosses have legendary actions in tactician and it’s fucking annoying. All the homies hate radiant retort….

Another tip is fucking collect everything. It’s hard to get gold and certain potion ingredients later on. Potion of Speed (you need hyena ears for this) is the BEST. I used them for my Ketheric fight (second phase) and killed him in three turns. I also used them for the final fight and used one or two with Raphael and Orin.

Smokepowder Barrels. I think people call this Barrelmancy? I didn't use them much. I hoarded them for one reason and one reason only.

To blow Raphael.

His soul pillar towers that is. To blow up his pillars. His big long pillars.

Okay I'm done.

(also I did use three in my last fight against the brain - popped them next to it and blew 'em up) Elixir of Bloodlust - sooooo handy with Astarion!

Invisibility Potion is a must - I used this to escape fights when three people were deaded (this happened a few times😅) and get my good friend Withers to bring them back.

bonus tip: don't go into a fight with half your spell slots because you think "she'll be right". she won't be...as seen above

HOLY FUCK WITHERS. You can pickpocket Withers. I used Astarion to get our money back anytime I resurrected, changed class or got a hireling - he doesn’t care if you fail either, just keep trying.

DON'T BE DUMB LIKE MISSY Don't be like me, don't half pay attention in cut scenes and accidentally press the wrong dialogue option. Or else your good friend Lae'zel will turn on you and you will have A Bad Time.

Gale has a stressful day💗

The githyanki are scary and actually now that I think about it, those were usually the fights I had to run away from like a leetle biatch.

Halsin has a stressful day 💗

I forgot that Psionic Backlash is like a thing that does damage and that if your entire worm filled party does it and the person you are casting is at like...say 19 health...they will die because that is not Passive Damage.

And then Jaheira will leave because you murdered her friend.

Oopsie.

(I lost Shart, Lae'Zel and Jaheira in this run) GENERAL STUFF

Always surprise the enemy if you can, it’s a massive advantage!

Get the eye from Volo. This run was not about looking pretty, it was about getting any advantage I could get. Let that man poke out your eyeball. And make sure it’s your Tav, you will mostly likely swap companions and it’s just better if it’s you. It's helpful in a lot of fights but especially Auntie Ethel

Become half illithid. I did this with my Tav, Gale and Minthara. Astarion was a little bitch about it so I didn’t give it to him but I wish I had made him do it.

She looks Not Great but she can fly (sorry Astarion but Z'hera only likes pussy)

Being able to fly is just SO helpful and cull the weak is OP! Also mmmmm worms :)

MY BUILD/PARTY

A Giant Woman (my tiefling) as a Paladin - Oath of Vengeance.

I broke my oath when I ascended Astarion but you can just get it back. Oathbreaker is still good (that’s what I was in my tactician run) but I wanted my channel divinity charges. I started with the Everburn Blade from the cambion Commander Zhalk on the Nautaloid (when you get Shart, give her the Command Spell and use “Drop” so you can just yoink it off him and save a fight). My final weapon was the Nyrulna which you can get in Act 3 at the Circus. To get this you must pickpocket the genie to take his ring and then play his game. He will accuse you of cheating and send you somewher. The prize at the end is this weapon. I love it. I just went invisible and walked through, I didn’t fight the creatures there.

Astarion - the classic gloomstalker/assasin. I had one level assasin and then did 6 levels ranger before going back to assassin. So he was 6 levels in each. With him ascended, he does INSANE damage. I never swap out that vamp, he’s too useful.

Shart/Minthara - I lost Shart in the Shadowfell - wouldn't let her murder Dame Aylin.

a simpler time. before I killed my beloved and my brain was full of worms.

I had to fight her (it was very sad). I changed her class to Life of Domain Cleric. I then made Minthara my cleric when Shart died (same build). She replaced my lover and my cleric <3

i love my new evil girlfriend

Gale - Evocation Wizard so I didn’t change him at all!

he's so hopeful. and Z'hera is very gay.

TIPS FOR POTIONS

If it’s throwable (like invisibility) group the gang together to throw one on the ground to get you all - saves using multiple.

Potion of Speed has an effect called lethargic that is active for one round after the potion ends. This means you miss a turn. HOWEVER! If you drink another one on the last active round of the potion, your Tav will become lethargic immediately and next round you’ll be fine :) I did this for the Ketheric fight.

It’s also helpful (because of lethargic) to not have all characters take the potion in the same round (if you give it to everyone). I never did, I usually gave them to Gale and my Tav.

I hoarded so many scrolls. I had so many dimension door scrolls at the end.

I did get the Necromancy of Thay and did all the things. And then I never used it :)

BIGGEST TIP ONCE YOU'VE UNLOCKING LEVEL 6 SPELL SLOT WITH CLERIC (ALSO AVAILABLE WITH DRUID)

I saw this on reddit! Pretty much what I did was get a hireling - Cleric - and have that Cleric cast Heroes' Feast on my party.

The affected entity is immune to Diseases, Poisons, and being Frightened, it makes all Wisdom Saving throws with Advantage, and its maximum Hit Points are increased by 12

Lasts until long rest!! I also then cast Freedom of Movement on everyone in the party. I then cast Warding Bond on someone - usually Gale because he's a squishy boy :) If I knew it was a BIG FIGHT! I got another Cleric to cast Warding Bond on another party member.

you can see Heroes' Feast (the condition is called Thoroughly Stuffed) and Freedom of Movement. These all last until long rest!

Pretty much any other companions were respeced as Cleric (though I made Jaheira a Wizard same as Gale so I could use her). I did this so that I could use Divine Intervention multiple times within the game!

I used Opulent Revival and nothing else

KEEP IN MIND.

anything can kill you in honour mode. even an elevator.

it crushed me. somehow.

thanks Larian

(if you want proper guides definitely go to Reddit!)

[havendance]

I finished reading Simone's run on Batgirl (2011) today, and it feels a bit like I'm reaching the end of an era for the new 52 between the upcoming change of directions for her and Dick and Birds of Prey coming to an end, so I figured it was time for another check in.

Batman -- I have already written extensively about Zero Year. I probably have another post or two in me about it if I can pull together the brainpower. It looks like there is ANOTHER Joker event coming up in Batman: Endgame soon. Woohoo. Sigh. Scott Snyder I do not actually dislike your writing, but why?

Batman and Robin -- The Two Face arc was fine. The thing that really through me off though was the fact that the description for the trade for this arc was like "what's the connection between Harvey Dent and Carrie Kelly?" and then Carrie Kelly didn't show up at all? Am I missing something? What is the timeline on this story?

Birds of Prey -- I am not particularly sad to see this one go. This whole series was just all pretty eh in my opinion. I didn't really care about most of the plot lines. I did like Strix, but I really don't have much else to say about this. The best Birds of Prey content honestly comes from whenever Simone dragged them into Batgirl which I think is not very surprising.

Batgirl -- Barbara's fighting Vampire's all of a sudden? Around the same time as Kate's Nocturna drama? It's not even October. Anyway, I did still enjoy the Batgirl: Wanted trade more than the Deadline trade, but this was still enjoyable enough. I really liked the second Annual with Poison Ivy (see my note about Simone writing the best new52 Birds of Prey content despite not writing Birds of Prey). I am of mixed opinions of Helena Wayne Huntress getting brought into the Deadline storyline because it's very much a 'we're homaging the Birds of Prey trio' storytelling decision, and like Simone created that trio, it's her final issues on Batgirl, she has the right to do that! But also they have none of the history and it makes me sad because I miss them and Wayne isn't Bertinelli :( The final confrontation with Knightfall also felt a little anticlimactic and I just know that the plot threads with Barbara's old roommate is about to get completely dropped which is a shame. I am also a little sad that it ends with Barbara asking Alysia to come with her when I know she's about to get stuck on a bus. Alas.

Anyway, this also collected the Batgirl: Futures End issue which, uh, was a story.

Batwoman -- There is a clear drop in art quality when J. H. Williams left the title sadly. The Rafael Albuquerque covers are very good though. As I said previously, it's a shame that Andreyko is under marching orders to break of Kate and Maggie because I like the way he writes them together. I'm curious how the title's going to go for the final arc, because the plots that weren't the Kate-Maggie drama were less interesting and now that he doesn't have that. I suppose the title does end in like 6 issues.

Nightwing -- Nightwing's Chicago era was really fun and I am sad to see Kyle Higgins go. I may have had some beef with him over the fact that he burned down Haley's Circus twice in a row, but he wrote a good Nightwing. It's a shame he was stuck in thew new52 because I would've liked to see what he could do with a Dick Grayson who actually had all of his history.

[abiteofhoney]

The Vampire and The Devilspawn

Hello!! I won’t do intros/notes in the beginning like this every time, but for the first time, I have a few things to say! First off, thank you to everyone that reads this story and takes this fun journey with me <3 thank you and i appreciate and cherish you all :) Secondly, I hope you can have a bit of patience with me as this progresses and I figure things out. As of posting this, I am 16 chapters in at roughly 50k. I am a proudly proclaimed pantser, so while I have a general direction for this story to take, most of it forms along the way. We're just having fun here, anyway! Third, this is, of course, a vampire story with some romance, and will come with the usual content warnings: blood, violence, biting, angst. All the fun stuff :) It follows both Magdalena and Anzurin's third person POVs.

Alright, enough of me. Here we go :)

4,889 words

Chapter 1 - Magdalena

She sits on her knees, slouching and weak, held up only by the fist gripping the back of her shirt, with only two thoughts tumbling around in her broken head. 

The first being her name. Magdalena Pierce. She knows that. There isn’t much else that she knows, but she knows that much, at least. 

The second is that she’s hungry beyond comprehension. The ache screams alive in her stomach, an empty hole unable to be filled, even though she’s tried. Blood still coats the front of her, having run in waves down her chin and throat and chest as she fed, and she thinks that she might have spilled more than she drank. 

They didn’t allow her to clean up before they attacked her, chained her wrists and ankles behind her back like she’s some type of animal. And Maggie just really doesn’t understand. The black-eyed woman told her to feed, so she did. She fed, and fed, and fed, and she’s still hungry. Starving. 

She tries to tell that to the man holding her, only getting out, “So hun-” before he slaps the back of her head with vicious force. Her teeth snap together, her fangs poking into her lip and drawing a bead of blood that she quickly licks up, then she looks up at the man that slapped her and gives him a throaty growl, baring her blood-coated teeth at him. 

“Should be stuffed, the way you fed. Now keep your mouth shut,” he snaps at her. Something about his empty black eyes and ruby red skin make her want to rip his sharp horns off of his skull. 

Maybe he’s right and she should be full, but the hunger gnaws at her stomach, an empty pit that cannot be satiated. Her fangs ache in her gums. Her eyes burn with frustrated tears. 

“Is he coming or what?” the same man barks at the two others standing across the room. 

They’re smart to keep their distance. Their sweat smells so tempting, even from this far. The blood from these black-eyed devilspawn tastes so delicious, and she yearns to taste it again. It was so sweet on her tongue with a hint of smoke. It settled in her stomach so nicely, and she wants more. 

“Anzurin should be here any minute,” one of the two answers. 

Magdalena peers at the man holding the back of her shirt. His corrupted heart beats heavily in his chest, a nervous thrum behind his ribs, which would be so easy to break. She got through the last one’s ribs with ease – but that’s also what has landed her here. 

She’s not really sure where here is. Where the lost causes go to get one more chance before they’re put down, the man holding her had said while they were transporting her, and she figured that sounds right. She did just drain a woman of all of her blood, and attack a few others that tried to stop her. Herra was the woman’s name, and Maggie only knows that because they wouldn’t stop yelling it at her. 

Why’d you kill Herra?

She’d like to kill them, too. She’d like to drink their blood until they’re empty, carve through their red flesh with her teeth. 

“Stop looking at me like that,” the man holding her barks, and the venom in his tone sets Magdalena on edge. It’s not her fault she’s hungry. It’s not her fault she’s like this. 

She’s not sure whose fault it is, but she is almost certain it’s not hers. 

Maybe it’s his. 

Magdalena lunges for him, fangs bared as she lurches for his leg. He yanks back just fast enough that all she gets is a mouthful of denim. She releases a growl from between her clenched teeth, a vicious one that comes from deep in her chest, but it’s quickly cut off by a kick to her ribs. 

A cry of pain falls from her as she tumbles to the floor, hands and feet still bound so that she can’t brace herself. Her shoulders and hips protest when she tries to curl in on herself, pain throbbing through her ribs. 

“You little shit!” the devilspawn shouts, giving her another kick. His leather boot slams into her hard enough to send her sliding backwards a few inches, only stopped by the wall behind her, and it feels like the second kick to her ribs cracks something. “Anzurin had better get here, now, and take this worthless leech off of my hands. I’m not -” 

He’s cut off by the door opening, somewhere near Magdalena’s feet as it shoves into them. “Hells below, Velur, have some patience,” a new voice drones. “I do have an entire coven to run, you see.”

Magdalena tries to move out of the way, scooting as much as she can but still crying through the pain in her ribs when the man kicks her again, not as hard this time but enough to move her out of the way of the door. She tries to bite the man’s leg even though she gets nowhere close. 

The newcomer laughs. “Well, what’s going on here?” 

“Fucking fledgling pain in my ass! She just tried to fucking bite me, and she’s already killed another devilspawn. Herra. Thought maybe you should knock some sense into her, but now I’m thinking that we ought to just put her down.” 

Another chuckle, and then he clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth. “Covered in blood, the poor thing. Hers or someone else's? She looks positively hungry.”

The man scoffs, and a wet glob of spit lands on Maggie’s forehead. “Some of it’s hers. Most of its Herra’s, her mentors. Drained her dead. If the bitch is still hungry after that, then something’s wrong with her.” 

Magdalena bucks at the insult, trying to break the chains around her wrists. If she could just use her hands again, she could sink her teeth into the black-eyed bastard’s neck before he could stop her. She snaps and snarls, throwing out hissed threats. 

He stares at her with those wide and empty eyes, mouth hanging open in shock before his entire face twists up in rage. His leg rears back, and Maggie welcomes it, knowing that if he really goes for it, she might actually be able to get a bite in if he gets close enough. 

But he doesn’t have the chance to send the kick when a voice cuts through the room. “Kick her, Velur, and you’ll be seen to.” It’s said so calmly, so casually that it doesn’t even sound like the threat it is. 

The one named Velur sneers down at Maggie, spits on her once more, and snaps, “She’s your problem now,” before storming out of the room. 

She tries to get him as he walks by, kicking his own legs out to trip him up, but it only yanks on her wrists. He gets away without a scratch, much to her dismay. Something about that man makes her just want to tear into his flesh, more than anyone else’s. 

When Maggie looks around, the two horned men are still standing across the room, but the new one stands much closer, arms crossed over his chest as he stares down at her. He’s much like the others – red-toned skin and horns sharper than her fangs – only his eyes are slightly different. The rest of them just have empty black eyes, and his are mostly the same, but he also has glowing red irises that gaze at her, giving his eyes more life. 

“Oh, dear, what are we to do with her?” the man murmurs to the two others.

“I don’t know, sir. She seems quite wild, yes? Maybe Velur was right and she’s just not made for the fledgling life. Perhaps death is the only thing that will fix her.” 

The man moves in a flash over to the one that just spoke, and Maggie giggles softly when he reaches out and smacks the back of the man’s head. “Look at her. She’s just hungry. Shall I kill you the next time you get hungry, Brem? Go take her chains off.” 

“You’re kidding. She just tried to bite Velur - more than once.” 

“Are you frightened by a little fledgling, Brem? Take those chains off of her. I won’t ask a third time.” 

Magdalena snarls at Brem as he dares closer, feeding off of the fear in his eyes and the shake in his hands. “Hells, please don’t attack me,” he whispers once he’s within reach. He grabs the chains around her ankles and moves her across the floor so he can reach the restraints behind her. 

She jerks away from his touch. She wants to be unbound, but she also wants to rip into the next person that touches her. She tries to kick at him, spit flying as she growls and snarls and gnashes her teeth at him.

But that red-eyed man flashes across the room again, and in an instant, he’s kneeling over her, a hand at the base of her throat to pin her to the ground. “Knock it off,” he commands sternly. His striking eyes bounce back and forth between her own, black eyebrows bunched together as he studies her face, but her gaze is only on his neck, the pulsing veins under his garnet flesh. 

She’s so, so, so hungry. 

“We’re going to take the restraints off of you, but you have to behave yourself fledgling. Can you do that?” 

Breathing heavily, Magdalena shakes her head. She truly doesn’t feel like she can control herself, not even a little bit. She doesn’t want to. 

“Oh, I think you can. Brem, let’s go,” he says to the other red-skinned creature, and then instructs the third in the room to, “Catch Velur before he leaves and get him back in here. I have questions.” He hasn’t taken his eyes from Maggie, nor has she taken her stare from his throat. “My name is Anzurin, and we’re going to make sure you’re taken care of here. What’s your name?” 

She doesn’t answer him, even though it’s probably the only time she will know the answer to anything. She grits her teeth together and runs her tongue over her fangs. They feel out of place in her mouth, new, even though she can’t remember a time without them. She can’t remember… much of anything.

All she knows is her name and her hunger, that she has fangs in her mouth and a need for blood. A hunger for red flesh. Thinking about sinking her fangs into the man above her sets her to wriggling again. 

Still pinning her to the ground, he smooths his hand over her blood-caked hair, brushing it out of her face. When she snaps for his wrist, he chuckles softly and holds his arm out of the reach of her teeth. “You’re just starved, aren’t you?” 

Once her chains are off, she’s going to bite him. She will. He smells so sweet, so tempting, she won’t be able to stop herself. 

The man rolls her on her side so that the other – Brem – can undo the chains behind her. He doesn’t yet release her wrists or ankles, but at least detaches them from each other so she can stretch out. 

“I’m going to sit you up, but you’re going to behave,” Anzurin says softly, but it’s not a question. It’s not a request. 

Not promising anything, Maggie pushes against his hand on her shoulder, sitting herself up, and she sighs in relief when she can put her legs out in front of her. The jeans she’s wearing are covered in blood, especially at the knees, as if she’d knelt in it, and maybe she did. She can’t really remember anything more than the feeling of her fangs in flesh. 

She tries to reach for the chains around her ankles without thinking about it, only to yank at the chains around her wrists still behind her back, her shoulders jerking painfully. An angry growl rips from her throat, wishing that she could rip the chains with her teeth like she so easily ripped through skin. She yanks on them again, this time on purpose, thinking just maybe she might be strong enough to break them. 

But they don’t budge. 

Brem kneels in front of her feet, eyeing her cautiously as he removes the chains from around her ankles. Her hungry gaze follows his every move, watching his wrists, his neck, salivating to think about the blood underneath. She bristles excitedly once her ankles are free and holds her wrists out to him, beyond ready to have use of her hands again. Saliva pools in her mouth as he slowly inches towards her side, nervousness radiating off of him. His black eyes shift to Anzurin. 

“I’ve never seen one like this,” Brem murmurs. “What’s wrong with her?” 

Anzurin grasps Magdalena’s chin, forcing her attention away from Brem. He searches her face for something – Maggie doesn’t really care what, because she’s stuck on his throat, unable to look away from it, unable to think about anything else except for how good it felt to flood her throat with that devilspawn’s blood. She bets his would taste just as good. 

“Nothing’s wrong with you, is there, fledgling? You’re just hungrier than normal,” Anzurin coos to her. He lifts her chin, trying to get her to look at him, but she doesn’t. She can’t. 

“So hungry,” she rasps. It’s a never ending hole inside of her, begging for more and more and more, a thirst unable to be quenched. 

“I thought as much. Come on, we’ll get you fed.” 

He hauls her to her feet, keeping a secure hold on her, but he makes no move against her, even when she tries to reach for his wrist, even when she bares her fangs at him. He only chuckles and guides her to the plush sofa against the opposite wall. Anzurin sits down first, then pulls her to sit at his side. He doesn’t have to guide her too much, as she easily follows his neck and wrists wherever they lead her. 

Once she’s settled next to him, pressed close against his side, he wraps his arm around her shoulders and places his wrist just in front of her mouth. Instinct tells her to chomp her teeth into his skin, gnaw until she’s full and his wrist is nothing but bone, but she gets distracted by the heavy pounding in her left ear. 

The noise comes from his throat, just inches from her face when she turns towards it. Wrists are dainty. So little would come out of it, compared to what would flow from his neck. She begins to lean in, but he jerks back and grabs the hair at the back of her head to keep her teeth off of his neck. “The wrist, fledgling, or nothing.”

He places it in front of her mouth once more and she can’t deny it a second time. She sinks her teeth into his rose-colored wrist with a starved fervor, fangs piercing him easily. Her mouth pools with delicious blood that tastes even better than Herra’s did. She was too sweet, almost like having dessert before dinner, but this… Anzurin… He’s a hearty meal. Savory and delicious. 

She digs in further, ripping through his flesh with her sharp, sharp fangs, biting down as hard as she can. She drinks from him with greed, unable to take a lot at a time but taking as much as he will give her. She’s so entranced by his blood that she doesn’t even open her eyes when the door opens once more and someone says, “I have Velur.” 

“Bring him in,” Anzurin drones. Maggie expects him to take his arm away any moment now, but he lets her keep feeding from him. 

“Stupid to let her loose,” Velur snaps, “and even more stupid to let her bite you. Don’t close that door, Brem – we’re going to want an escape when she’s down gnawing his arm.” 

“So dramatic.” Anzurin hums and brushes Maggie’s dirty hair off of her forehead with his free hand. “Sure, she’s a little rough with the teeth, but she’s starving. Insatiable, this one. Tell me about her.” 

“She can tell you whatever you wanna know if she doesn’t kill you.” 

“I think she’s a bit too distracted to answer any questions. I tried to ask her name, but she wouldn’t say.” 

“Weird, since it was the only thing she’d say earlier,” Velur scoffs. “Magdalena Pierce.” 

The hatred in his voice when he spits her name gets Maggie to open her eyes. Every time he speaks, she just wants to tear him into little pieces, so she tries. She shoves Anzurin’s arm away and lunges for Velur. She makes it off of the couch and across the small table, sending papers and items clattering to the floor. She reaches out for Velur, trying to grab him, scratch him, rip him apart with her teeth, anything she can do to hurt him like he’s hurt her. He’s the one that chained her up after she fed, and he smacked her and kicked her many times. She’s sure that his blood would be bitter, but she wants to taste it anyway. 

But she doesn’t get to, ripped away by Anzurin’s arms closing around her waist at the last second, yanking her back against himself. He puts his wrist back to her mouth, saying, “Right here – feed,” but she pays it no mind, too wrapped up in her seething anger directed at Velur. She fights and kicks and scratches and bites to no avail. 

“See what I mean?” Velur snaps. “She’s fucked! Just do us all a favor and put her down, Anzurin, before she kills another.” 

Anzurin struggles to keep Maggie restrained, but manages to sit back down on the sofa with her. “I’ll be honest, Velur, I’m not sure she’s the problem here. I think you are.” He smears his blood across her lips, going as far as to grip her chin to force her mouth open to drip blood on her tongue, but she continues to fight against his hold to get to Velur. “Doesn’t even care. I think she just wants you dead.” 

Velur scoffs. “Or you just don’t taste as good as you think you do, big shot.” 

“So, what’d you do to her?” Anzurin asks and then brings his lips to Maggie’s ear to whisper, “I know you’re still hungry. Drink.”

And she is very, very hungry, so she gives up her fight - for now- and sinks her teeth into his arm once more, marking more of a mess of the already mangled flesh. 

“Gentler,” he hisses through his teeth, and she hisses right back at him. If he were as hungry as she is, he wouldn’t want to be gentle either. She wants to rip and tear and gorge herself on both flesh and blood. 

“She killed Herra,” Velur says incredulously. “It took multiple men to drag her off of Herra’s corpse, and a few of them even got bit in the process!” 

Anzurin strokes her hair as she quits fighting and settles once more. “And?” 

“Wh - And?! She killed one of our own! Do you not care?” 

“Not so much,” he says with a shrug. “That’s the risk we take. She’s a fledgling, Velur. It’s her very nature to feed. To kill. Why would you punish her for it? Every part of her screams for blood and she shouldn’t be denied; she just needs to learn a little control, that’s all. How long ago was she changed?” 

“Hells, I don’t know! Didn’t even know the bitch existed until she had to be ripped off of Herra’s neck today.” 

At the insult that leaves his lips, Maggie lets out a growl and cuts a glare at him, but she doesn’t lift her mouth from Anzurin’s wrist. Her hunger never ends. 

Anzurin laughs heartily. “Oh, she definitely just hates you. When’d she come into the coven?” 

“I don’t know,” he says again. “I don’t usually handle the fledglings.” 

“Find who does and bring them to me. I want to know where she came from.” He trails his touch down the side of Maggie’s face. He’s not even holding onto her anymore; she’s just happily drinking from him and not even trying to get away anymore. Her hunger is outweighing her instinct to fight, but only by a fraction. “She acts as though she’s gone weeks without feeding. And if that’s the case, I’m not at all surprised that she drained Herra. And she’s still going.” 

“She -” 

“I said to find who knows where she came from. Now. Not later.” 

Velur grumbles angrily, but jumps at the chance to leave the room. 

Once the door shuts behind him, a moment passes in which the only sound is Maggie drinking greedily and desperately from Anzurin’s wrist, but he soon says, “That’s enough for now.” 

She doesn’t listen. Magdalena holds onto his arm tighter, taking bigger gulps. Her nails dig into his skin just as her teeth do, drawing even more blood. She just wants more, more, more, and it’s still not enough. 

But then Anzurin fists the hair at the back of her skull and yanks. Her teeth rip from his arm, tearing flesh as he jerks her head back. 

Magdalena snarls and tries to twist and bite the hand grabbing her, but Anzurin keeps his grip and stares down at her. Gently, but sternly, he says, “That’s enough, Magdalena. We need to go get you cleaned up and looked over so we know what we’re dealing with here. You have to control yourself.” 

She whines, low in her throat. “But I’m so –” 

“Hungry, I know,” he coos. He looks to Brem across the room. “Get me three bags from the fridge, please. Open one of them.” 

Brem does as told, and all Magdalena can do is watch with Anzurin’s grip still in her hair, her head angled backwards. Brem goes over to a small black fridge in the corner, opening to the door to reveal two shelves stuffed full of bags of blood, but Magdalena hardly cares about that when the fresh taste of Anzurin’s blood is still stuck to her teeth. He grabs three of them as asked and brings them to Anzurin, who stuffs the first two in the pockets of his black coat while Brem opens the plastic spout of the third. 

A small bubble of blood pools out of the top as the pressure is released, spilling onto Brem’s finger, and he freezes in place while his fearful black eyes flick to Magdalena. 

“You know,” Anzurin murmurs as he takes the open bag, “she probably loves that you’re so scared right now. You know they don’t just feed on blood, Brem.” He waves the packaged blood under Magdalena’s nose, but the cold scent of it nearly makes her gag. She wants the fresh stuff, and tries to look for Anzurin’s bitten arm. 

He jerks her hair. “No, drink this.”

The stinging in the back of her head is what makes her snap. Magdalena yanks her head out of his grip, leaving chunks of hair between his fingers. She claws his face and her fangs go straight for his neck. He tries to grab her hair again, but she’s faster, and slams it to the wall above his head. 

On her feet, crouching next to him on the sofa, she uses her foot to pin his other hand to the sofa cushion, and that leaves a hand free to hold his head to the side so she can sink her teeth into his neck. She rips and tears, getting flesh stuck between her teeth, but filling her screaming stomach with his delicious blood. 

But as her stomach fills, so does the room with shouts and yells and screams. Something wraps around her waist and pulls, but she claws back at it and it goes away, but then something cold is wrapped around her throat, and the chains that once bound her yank her back. 

Magdalena loses her balance and falls to her back on the floor, but quickly turns on the one that pulled her off: Brem, backing away with large black eyes. Her rage swells into something unmanageable and she lunges for him, biting anything she can get her teeth in, which happens to be his upper arm, biting through cloth to tear at the rosy skin underneath. 

His blood is sharper than the others, only a fraction of the sweetness, and Maggie doesn’t like it as much, but it softens the edges of her hunger, so she pins his arms to his side and gulps as much as she can. As she knew she would be, she’s yanked back seconds later, turned by her shoulder and slammed back against the wall with a large devilspawn body in front of her and his forearm across her chest. Something else wraps around her ankles, and she kicks at what she assumes is the chains, but looks down to see a red tail curling tightly around her leg. 

“Stop it,” Anzurin growls at her, red eyes blazing. “Control yourself, fledgling, or I will do it for you.”

She tries to shove him off to no avail without the element of surprise on her side this time. He stays put, holding her down. Breathing heavily, she stares at his torn neck, his blood running down his throat and chest, soaking into his tan shirt. After a few moments of futile fighting, she relents and lies perfectly still to glare up at him. 

Anzurin breathes just as heavily, touching his fingers to his bleeding neck with a sharp inhale through his teeth. “I’d like to be able to let you go, but I need to be able to trust that you’re not going to attack one of us again. Can we do that?” 

In a jerking motion, Maggie shakes her head back and forth. She’s only stopped fighting for now because she knows it's a waste of energy to fight against him. As soon as he gives her even an inch, she’ll take it, but she’s saving her energy for that. 

“Now, Magdalena,” he says with a tsk. “Do you understand what’s going to happen to you if you can’t control yourself?” 

She spits a mouthful of blood-tinged saliva at him, which lands on his chin. 

Besides clenching his jaw, he shows no other reaction and uses the sleeve of his shirt to wipe his chin. “You’re going to have to be put down if you can’t behave,” he tells her. “I do not tolerate this kind of behavior in my coven, and you are too wild to go anywhere else. If you can’t control yourself, then you will be controlled. Is that what you want to happen? Do you want us to have to kill you?” 

She doesn’t answer, unsure that she has an answer at all. Does she want to be killed? No, not particularly. But does she want to keep living? Maybe not, if this is the pain and treatment she has to endure. Her hunger is insatiable, fueling a need to rip and tear. She even thinks about biting her own flesh just for a taste of blood. 

“It doesn’t have to be this way,” Anzurin murmurs in her silence, keeping his voice gentle and comforting. “We’ll feed you and make sure you’re taken care of, but you have to behave with us. With me, at the very least. I’m the one that will decide what happens to you, so I suggest you behave.” 

Magdalena only grumbles unhappily and tries uselessly to wriggle out from under him, but his arm holds her shoulders against the wall, his tail around her ankle keeping her from kicking. 

“Okay, you can’t keep denying that there’s something wrong here,” Brem says from where he stands nearby, chains still in his hands. “This isn’t normal for a fledgling.” 

Brows creased, Anzurin studies her quizzically. “There’s something wrong with the situation, definitely. Something’s been done to her. Someone else did this to her.” 

Brem dares a step closer. “What do you mean?” 

“She’s starved, Brem. Her fangs are sharper than a new fledgling's should be. Hazarding a guess, I’d say that she’s a few months old, and I’m thinking that today is the first time she’s drank since she was changed. Am I right about that?” he asks her. 

Maggie can’t remember anything before today, but she’s certainly older than just a few months. She’s a grown woman. But she does also feel like she hasn’t eaten or drank anything in quite a while. Maybe ever. 

With his free hand, Anzurin brushes Magdalena’s hair out of her face. He then orders Brem to hand him the bag of blood that she’d turned her nose up at before. “You can’t keep drinking from me right now - I don’t have that much blood to spare - but you can drink these bags. I know they’re not as good, not as fresh, but it’s what you’re going to get right now. I’ll give you as many as you want – but only if you promise to try to control yourself.” 

Against every fighting instinct, Magdalena nods. 

—

Ending notes won't happen all the time either, but just a thing or two more to tack on.

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[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Tuesday, July 30

Jenny: Pretty flimsy excuse for coming by to see me. Giles: You should have heard the ones I threw out. I just, I wanted to, uh... see how you were doing. Jenny: I'm doing pretty good, actually. I've stayed out of mortal danger for three whole weeks. I could get used to it. I'm still having trouble sleeping, though. Giles: Oh, of course. Um... you, you, you need time. Jenny: Or possibly space. Rupert, I know you're concerned. But having you constantly poking around, making little puppy dog eyes at me, wondering if I'm okay... You make me feel bad that I don't feel better. I don't want that responsibility.

~~~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Cheese (Buffy/Riley, G) by Kittenwritings

Cuddle Pile (Fred/Cordelia/Willow, T) by Kittenwritings

Somewhere Only We Know (Fred/Spike, G) by Kittenwritings

dimension hopping / dimension travel (Fred/Spike, T) by Kittenwritings

character realizes they want to join their best friends' relationship (Angel/Fred/Spike, T) by Kittenwritings

Sneaking Around (Buffy/Maggie Walsh, T) by Kittenwritings

Get You Alone (Fred/Spike, T) by MadeInGold

The Aftermath (Spike/Ben, T) by MadeInGold

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Doctor, Can You Help Me? (Buffy/Ben, E) by MadeInGold

[Chaptered Fiction]

of all the wonders (that i have heard) Ch. 1 (Dawn, T, Agents of SHIELD xover) by luxaII

Altered Images Ch. 1-4/? (Ensemble, T) by KnightRanger

Scheduling Concerns (Fred's Birthday Fic part 1) (Multiple Pairings, E) by Kittenwritings

To Sail the Starry Sea Ch. 1-2/2 COMPLETE (Buffy/Spike, E) by eevol76vamp

Once Chosen Ch. 2 (Buffy/Giles, M) by RowanIsabellaMcCarter

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I Do!, Chapter 33 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Dusty

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The Buffybot Falls In Love, Chapter 2 (Buffy/Spike, G) by Desicat

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[Reviews & Recaps]

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You know what the Turok Han should have been? by nicnacsnonsense

honestly one of the best character mirrors on this show is willow and giles. by greensaplinggrace

Having thoughts about the effects of Merrick’s ‘not-quite’ existence on Buffy and Giles’ relationship again by duckwnoeyes

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Most Out Of Character, Plot Hole-y, or Confusing Season 7 Moments by luxaII

Underrated Villains by ElephantWorldly5010

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Buffy The Vampire Slayer - Season 3 - Episode 7 - Revelations by Mat1711

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the fan response to Spike after S6 by g_island_

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I did it again!

Please consider yourself tagged if you want to! Feel free to @ me so I can read them.

This time it's Paloma (drow monk) and Lamia (changeling bard rogue disguised as a half-drow)! More under the cut.

Paloma

I. what do they smell like at their freshest? (and/or after a tenday. your choice)

Her kids would tell you she smells "like mom."

Other people describe her scent as pomegranate, ylang ylang, and mandarin.

II. what would their blood taste like to vampires?

It would be sweet and fruity like peaches or maybe a little tart like pomegranate juice.

III. how would they kiss their LI?

She's a sweet and gentle kisser until you get her in the bedroom. She loves to shower her lover with kisses whenever she can. She's a body worshipper with her kisses, too.

IV. how do they sleep with their LI (what position, does one steal the blankets, is one too hot/cold, etc)?

She's always cold and hates it. She piles on the blankets and probably has her own separate blankets to avoid stealing from her lover. She would also be pressed against Halsin for warmth. Even in the summer, she'd be desperate for body heat.

He'd happily hold her tightly.

V. what does their tent area look like? where do they prefer to pitch their tent (next to water, covered on three sides, etc)?

It's immaculate with very little clutter. She travels light so it would mostly just be things necessary for survival and to make the trip moderately comfortable. She does carry a few gifts from her kids. (She avoids images of them for the children's safety.)

She also always has a snack stash. She's a mom and it's habit now.

VI. if they had a set of dnd dice, what would they look like?

It'd be blue sandstone.

Photo from Crystal Maggie.

VII. do they collect anything (gems, bottles, keys, etc)?

She doesn't really collect things. She's not a big fan of owning more than she needs.

VIII. if either, are they part of the astarion/gale book club (magic & literature) or the wyll/shadowheart book club (trashy romance novels)?

She'd be in Astarion and Gale's club. She loves to read and she'd ask those two for recommendations. She wouldn't mind hearing what Shadowheart and Wyll recommend though.

IX. if they had to be put in a “get along shirt” with a companion, who would it be?

Minthara. They do not like each other and they never see eye to eye on things. Paloma is so unlike lolth-sworn drow that she rarely gets on with any of them. She doesn't keep up with traditional drow politics either.

Paloma has a son and doesn't appreciate a lot of the choice words Minthara has to say about that.

X. do they prefer speak with dead or speak with animals?

She'd say speak with animals.

XI. what are their thoughts on clowns?

She hates them and considers them annoying, but just tries to ignore them when she can. She happily sends Minthara to go on stage with Dribbles.

One of her kids loves them so she knows way too much clown fandom lore. It's her curse.

XII. their companions are gossiping about them behind their back! who is it and what are they saying?

She's secretive so her companions would try to figure out what she's hiding. They would find little hints of something here and there. They'd be trying to solve the mystery and coming up with ideas.

While Shadowheart would respect her privacy, she's not above what she sees as harmless theorizing. She'd assume she was running away from something dark. Astarion would have the most outlandish theories about who she really is. Wyll would romanticize whatever her history is. Gale tries not to gossip about it, but he has some very educated guesses he wants to share.

They would also gossip about how unlike most drow she is. Minthara would loudly talk shit about her "behind her back."

The other gossip would be how she was good at hiding what a horndog she is until she met Halsin.

XIII. what makes them laugh? what does their laugh sound like?

She has a deep and soft laugh. She has a very dry, deadpan sense of humor, but she can also be silly. Her kids can always make her laugh. She and Jaheira have a very similar sense of humor.

If she didn't hate Minthara so much, she'd admit she's really funny.

XIV. do they have any inside jokes among their companions?

She'd have a few with Halsin. There would be a lot of innuendo that would make everyone roll their eyes. I'm really struggling with the inside jokes part of this and I can't say why.

She and Jaheira would. I have to revisit this after I think of anything good to share.

XV. what’s the description of their camp clothes in the inventory menu?

"Warm and snug, but made of flexible material in case heads need to roll in the middle of the night."

XVI. what’s the description of their underwear in the inventory menu?

"Not the type of underwear associated with monks, but something a little more fun...."

XVII. how do they celebrate their birthday?

She's not used to taking time for herself so she never really celebrated her birthday. For years, only Lamia would acknowledge it and get her a gift and a slice of cake.

After the kids were old enough, they try to do things for their mom's birthday. They cook for her, take care of the house for her, and just want to do things with her. Halsin easily slips into that family dynamic. Halsin gives her meaningful gifts and makes sure she doesn't have to lift a finger for the day. The kids and Halsin always make sure she gets cinnamon rolls for her birthday breakfast.

XVIII. what modern day tv show would they binge over a weekend? do they get their LI to watch with them?

She'd binge shows like The Bear, Carol & the End of the World, Cunk on Earth, Mandy (she'd love Diane Morgan), Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries, Fleabag, and Bridgerton.

She'd also watch UNHhhh and Drag Race with her sister, Lamia. She wouldn't ask Halsin to watch with her, but he probably would watch her favorite shows to understand her interests better. They'd watch so many documentaries together.

She would also be a Bluey mom.

XIX. do you have a playlist for your tav? if so, what’s the title + description?

I never name my playlists lol. I'm way too lazy.

Surface Pressure - Jessica Darrow

Reach - Madds Buckley

Landslide - Fleetwood Mac

Fast Car - Tracy Chapman

She Used To Be Mine - Sara Bareilles

Momma's Got This - Kathryn Hahn, Kristen Bell, and Tituss Burgess

Zero Gravity - Kate Miller-Heidke

Moral of the Story - Ashe (about her ex and father of her children)

Eldest Daughter - Isabel Pless

No Time To Die - Billie Eilish (another one for her ex)

Ready Now - Dodie (this honestly works for Paloma/Halsin or her relationship with Lamia)

Like Real People Do - Hozier (for Paloma/Halsin)

Speechless - Alicia Keys ft Eve (for her children)

Sweetest Devotion - Adele (for her babies again)

Closer - Nine Inch Nails (for Paloma/Halsin)

Thousand Miles - Miley Cyrus ft Brandi Carlile

You're Gonna Be - Reba McEntire (for her children once more)

Praying - Kesha

Breath (2 AM) - Anna Nalick (it felt perfect for her and Lamia's bond)

Interlude: I'm Not Angry Anymore - Paramore

XX. if you were to try pickpocketing them, what would they be carrying?

She wouldn't have much aside from some money, snacks, and some pictures her children drew for her.

Lamia

I. what do they smell like at their freshest? (and/or after a tenday. your choice)

She tries not to smell too strongly of anything so she can sneak up on people more effectively. She'd probably smell like a mixture of leather and rosin if you got close enough.

If she's going to an event where she can dress up and doesn't have to worry about sneaking around, she smells like amber and honey with a touch of vanilla.

II. what would their blood taste like to vampires?

It'd be sweet and spicy like a sweet serrano chili sauce.

III. how would they kiss their LI?

She has two love interest options: Astarion and Wyll.

She's passionate, but often sloppy. She's not used to romance, but hot and heavy trysts and booty calls.

When in a more vulnerable state, she's more likely to give slow and/or delicate kisses.

IV. how do they sleep with their LI (what position, does one steal the blankets, is one too hot/cold, etc)?

She runs hot and she's a flopper. She flops around in her sleep and steals all of the blankets. It's like sharing a bed with a cat.

She gets a little better at sharing her space over time. She still wakes up all over the place, or sprawled out over her lover.

V. what does their tent area look like? where do they prefer to pitch their tent (next to water, covered on three sides, etc)?

It is a mess. She has booze bottles that she promises she's going to toss out soon. There are plenty of knives and whatever objects and money she's stolen. She doesn't like being snuck up on so she always makes sure her tent is up against a wall or something.

VI. if they had a set of dnd dice, what would they look like?

It would be white with red blood splatter

Photo from DigitalDice on Etsy.

VII. do they collect anything (gems, bottles, keys, etc)?

Not exactly. The girl just steals things and keeps it in her tent. Some things she keeps in case she "needs it" or she sells it.

VIII. if either, are they part of the astarion/gale book club (magic & literature) or the wyll/shadowheart book club (trashy romance novels)?

Wyll/Shadowheart, without a doubt.

In a relationship with Astarion, he would be able to talk her into reading certain books. They'd have a private book club away from the others... that would turn into a lot of sex.

IX. if they had to be put in a “get along shirt” with a companion, who would it be?

Lae'zel. They don't hate each other, but they can't stand each other. They fight all of the time. It's amazing they haven't killed each other.

X. do they prefer speak with dead or speak with animals?

Speak with animals. She loves animals, what can I say?

XI. what are their thoughts on clowns?

Lamia loves clowns, especially when they make others uncomfortable. It's part of the joy. Astarion is so confused by this love. She definitely would go to a clown show with Wyll.

XII. their companions are gossiping about them behind their back! who is it and what are they saying?

She does a lot of the gossiping while simultaneously being offended when others gossip about her. She wants to be loved. But really there's a lot of "How do we solve a problem like Maria Lamia" going on behind her back. Her companions would be near mutiny until they realized she actually knows what she's doing. Then it'd go from judgmental to concerned. This girl really needs to get her life together.

I'm playing with her as a Dark Urge and after that's revealed, people would talk about that behind her back. Even if they trust her, it's hard not to gossip about hanging out with a real Bhaalspawn.

XIII. what makes them laugh? what does their laugh sound like?

Campy things can get her to laugh. She does love sarcasm and anti-humor. Her sense of humor can be mean spirited, but she never wants to REALLY hurt anybody.

She has two laughs. Her low chuckle and her very loud cackle. Her cackle can be likened to an old school anime laugh.

XIV. do they have any inside jokes among their companions?

She and Astarion have a million inside jokes. I'm still blanking on what they'd be. They'd probably have way too many Bhaal jokes. She'd also have plenty with Wyll.

Naturally, she has a lot of inside jokes with Paloma. They're sisters, y'know? Since she's a Bhaalspawn, she'd have an inside joke or two with Orin and Gortash. Lamia often remembers weird shit people have said. Most of her inside jokes are this:

Gortash misspoke one time and now she'll never let him live it down, even as mortal enemies.

I have to figure out how to mash Lamia's original backstory with the Bhaalspawn storyline.

XV. what’s the description of their camp clothes in the inventory menu?

"Though it's comfortable for a nice of restful sleep, it's also perfect for slipping away into the shadows."

XVI. what’s the description of their underwear in the inventory menu?

"Why even bother wearing underwear at all?"

There's just not that much fabric.

XVII. how do they celebrate their birthday?

There'd be a lot of partying and drinking. She usually ends up totally trashed by the end of the night. There's a present pile for her and a lot of party foods.

As time passes, she does less crazy partying. She starts to value just getting some drinks with friends and having them show her with gifts and praise. (She isn't going to be a different person, just a calmer one.)

XVIII. what modern day tv show would they binge over a weekend? do they get their LI to watch with them?

She's binging a lot of UNHhhh, Rupaul's Drag Race, and The Boulet Brothers' Dragula. Astarion and/or Wyll would happily watch all three with her. Paloma already watches them with her and Lamia probably even has the kids watching it once they're old enough.

She'd watch a lot of reality TV, It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, and True Blood. Astarion and Wyll would love it. You cant tell me they wouldn't love trash TV.

Wyll has a LOT of opinions on The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.

XIX. do you have a playlist for your tav? if so, what’s the title + description?

Opportunities (Let's Make Lots of Money) - Pet Shop Boys

Daisy - Ashnikko

Dirty Imbecile - The Happy Fits

Sweet But Psycho - Ava Max

Bad Girls - Tennis

Angry Too - Lola Blanc

Lilith - Ellise

How to Be a Heartbreaker - MARINA

Demons - Hayley Kiyoko

One Love Can Save Me Now - The Pretty Reckless (for either Lamia/Astarion or Lamia/Wyll)

Devil's Worst Nightmare - FJØRA

Psycho - Maisie Peters (I heard this and immediately thought Lamia/Gortash)

Joke's On You - Charlotte Lawrence

Villainous Thing - Shayfer James

The Red Means I Love You - Madds Buckley (for Lamia/Astarion)

Work Song by Hozier (for Lamia/Wyll)

Mess Is Mine by Vance Joy (for Lamia/Wyll)

Tear You Apart - Megan McDuffee (for Lamia/Astarion)

Arms Tonite - Mother Mother (for Lamia/Astarion)

Nobody's Daughter - Hole

XX. if you were to try pickpocketing them, what would they be carrying?

Money and knives. So many knives. And then she'd stab whoever pickpocketed her with one of those knives.